14 will get you 20

me: can i help you?
female: um, yes, i'd like some ice cream
me: what kind?
female: um, hmm...how about that one?
m: this?
f: yes...i like your eyes.
m: (i smile) thanks.
f: and your smile is really pretty too
m: thanks. i'll tell my orthodontist you like his work. (who's a stud? i'm a stud)
f: how old do you have to be to work here?
m: (danger will robinson!!!!) 16.
f: oh, well, two more years. are you the owner?
m: (sweet jesus!!!! two more!?!?!?) yes, why? (run mike, run far and fast. right now)
f: well, you had better have this store for at least two more years
m: (sweet jesus no). well, i certainly hope so. will that be all for you?
f: (pauses, smiles and tries to make eye contact while i have my head buried in the cash register) yes, that's all.
m: (thank god)

lactic acid

wow am i sore from yesterday. that is all.

screw you and that fancy ass horse you rode in on

last night was my first ever big group bike ride. there were about 40 people who all met at a park and took off on an hour long ride. when i first got there, i meandered around asking people if there's anything special i need to know. it turns out that there are really three groups that ride together. the "take no prisoners A group", the "b's", and finally the "c's". the lady in charge asked me how fast I was and i gave her my honest answer. "i have no idea." she suggested that i start with the b's and if i get dropped, i'll join up with the c's later on. sounds like a plan.

i start in the back of the pack with the b's and quickly get bored. so i jump out in the lead to see if i can't pull everybody around with me for a while (in cycling the guy out in front has to do about 20% more work than those behind). we get about half way through the ride and i see the 'a' group about 3/4 of a mile ahead. you know that switch that i talk about that puts me in 'hunt and kill mode'? well, it flipped on. so i punch it as hard as i can for about 5 minutes and finally, with the aid of a stoplight, catch up to them and lose the 'b' group in the process.

i hung with them for about 10 more minutes before i finally found out why they are called the "take no prisoners a's" instead of just the 'a group'. these guys are just as competitive as i am. if someone jumps out in the lead, well, fuck that. it's on. somebody else is right there challenging them for the lead. and yes, i got sucked into this little competition as well. my legs hurt like hell when the ride was over.

as we are coasting into the parking lot, one of the faster guys starts ribbing us on going for a run. this is the same guy that took the lead from me on the bike on 3 different occasions. screw him. "i'm in", i say to him and he gives me the doubtful look and starts telling me how i need to be faster in the transition as we are "losing valuable time". i made him pay for that one. i normally push myself pretty hard on a run, but rarely as hard as i was pushing last night. i lost him in the first 1/2 mile and posted 7:02 miles (yes, i was ready to puke). he came into the parking lot almost 15 minutes behind me.

going out with a bang

tonight was my last night playing in the field and the soccer gods decided to give me a proper send off. tonight they blessed this horribly uncoordinated runner with the ability to steal the ball from one defender and dribble past (okay, so it was more like dribbling 'through'...i still have no moves) another defender and put one in the corner of the net. sadly enough for my team, this put me as the highest scorer for the session with 6 goals and 2 assists out of the team's 14 goals. seriously, if you've seen me play, you would not stop making fun of our forwards for letting this be the case.

next week, it's back to goalkeeping duty. i can't wait. scoring is fun but there is no better feeling than shutting down a one on one or robbing someone of a backdoor goal.

hydration

i went to the gym to swim for a bit tonight and while in the pool, thoughts turned to yesterday's 52/6 brick. here's what i realized. usually, the day after a hard workout i'm sore. immediately following the workout, i feel like ass and i have a case of 'the stupids'. 'the stupids' is what i call that feeling like you're half drunk. you bump into things. your balance isn't too good. if i'm asked a question, it takes much greater effort to form a coherent thought. when the thought does form, speaking is even difficult. it's almost the slurred speech effect of alcohol but not quite as severe.

NONE of these happened after what was a fairly hard workout. why? i think it's because i finally had a smart workout. i started pushing fluids early. lots of accelerade and water. by the time the bike portion was over, i had consumed almost 100 oz. of fluid and 800 calories. 2600 were burned during the bike, and an additional 700 from the run means that 2500 had to come from glycogen stores. normally i'll take in 200 calories, tops. shoveling in the extra 600 probably pushed back my bonk by quite a ways.

the key to the whole thing though had to be the hydration. as i've mentioned here before, 'the stupids' are probably caused by dehydration where your brain is taking an acid bath and the neurons aren't firing very quickly (just like alcohol). the soreness was probably helped out by an increased blood volume and ability to move lactic acid out of the muscles. this helped my overall condition after the workout as my body was not busy fighting to 'catch up' by removing crap that had been slowly building for the previous 4 hours. it was already gone.

proof that i actually did work hard and not just sally my way through the workout came in my sleep pattern. i was exhausted when i hit the pillow last night and even after 8 good hours, i've been pretty tired today. when i hit the pool tonight, i had one of my worst workouts ever. i couldn't string more than 150 meters together. i was just too pooped. it will take about a week for my glycogen stores to come back up so i imagine my workouts for the next 5 days are going to suck too.

12 days to go.

a good healthy dose of confidence

as you might know, in exactly 13 days, i'm undertaking the longest and possibly hardest race i've ever entered...the steelhead half ironman. 1.2 miles in the water, 56 miles on the bike, and 13.1 miles on foot. kyle, hebda, and myself have a friendly wager on the race. he who loses, buys dinner for the other two. he who wins, gets to pick the restaurant. the idea is that you don't want to lose. well, if you know me, you know how competitive i am (who else do you know that will race a fullsize caterpillar forklift down the street?) so 2nd or 3rd just are not acceptable.

up until this morning, i was nervous about not only winning, but just finishing. 70 miles is a long fucking ways. today, hebda and i went out for our final big workout before the taper. 52 miles of biking followed by a run for as far as our legs will carry us.

the bike section went smooth as can be. we averaged ~19mph including some slow sections by the AVP Pro Tour on North Avenue beach and me dicking around a couple times to either chase down a honda or see if i could get to 30mph without a draft (i can!) With the ride finished, my legs are feeling pretty loose and i still feel like i have some gas in the tank.

We transition and head out on foot to see exactly what kind of mess our bodies are going to break down into. Long story short, i get through 6 miles at a 7:30 pace and by the time we get back, i'm almost positive that i can hold the pace for 7 more miles (yea, it would hurt, but it could be done).

so the dose of confidence that the title speaks of:
i now know i can do the full distance without a problem. now it's just a question of how fast. the way i figure, i'll be the last one of the three of us out of the water by 4 minutes on hebda and 9 on kyle. i can make up the time on hebda on the bike but kyle will probably put an additional 16 minutes on me on the bike. i have to make up 25 minutes on the run. i know he's shooting for a 2 hour run, but if i can hold my pace, i can get him...especially if i can see him in front of me. if that happens, it's all over.